Moonlight Phoenix has risen

music, feminism, spirituality, words and more

Self Love

on August 7, 2018

Self love is a term we often hear bandied about these days, yes we need to love ourselves more, but how exactly do we give ourselves self love, and what is it? Is it through affirmations, yoga, meditation? Or is it through getting massages, face masks, writing positive messages on the mirror to read in the morning before we walk out the door?

Self love can be many things and that is why maybe it is the hardest thing that’s possible to do, even when you read every magazine article and like every self love quote meme going around Facebook and Instagram, and yet still we are not loving ourselves fully.

Most of us live in a cloud of judgement, this judgement is actually created by ourselves. From a young age we take in every belief from everything around us, from the media, teachers/school, family, friends, everything. If we get told we’re useless enough times we’ll soon believe it. Then this manifests into high standards we have created for ourselves to make ourselves “good enough”. The truth is we are enough.

This is why self love is possibly the hardest hurdle for most of us on our healing journey. As it means we have to let go of every negative thing we have ever been told about ourselves, including our own self talk which is probably the worst of them all. It means fully accepting yourself as you are. It means honouring your own choices without anything else taking you away from your personal truth. It means setting boundaries and keeping them.

Self love is almost a contradiction which is why it can’t necessarily be resolved with a few positive affirmations or a once a month pamper session.  As it also means knowing that you will sometimes fall down, that sometimes you will struggle. But also being in a place of acceptance that you are able to feel the emotions and acknowledge them, but not let them rule you.

It means eating healthily and in the right way for your body, but also not denying yourself when you want chocolate/caffeine/sugar! It means moving your body, but also sometimes just laying about doing nothing.  It means getting out there, but also going within. It’s working towards your goals, but also taking downtime.

It’s knowing that no one and nothing is perfect. Loving yourself is loving all of you and that’s a hard thing to do. But we can do it! ❤

 

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