Moonlight Phoenix has risen

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July 2017 look back

hello august…!

here’s how I did with goals and intentions during July..

Happiness/Divine Feminine/Balance- with regards to happiness, I did more in July so that made me feel happier.

Divine feminine still a lot of the same work I’ve been doing (it’s just so much a part of me now it just comes naturally) and I also read an amazing book during July called ‘Love Your Lady Landscape’ by Lisa Lister, which has even given me even more beautiful and powerful work to do. I really recommend this book to ALL women, it’s very powerful work but also written in a very light hearted and down to earth way which is so reassuring and comfortable, making it easy to understand even if you have never done anything spiritual related before.

Balance- think I was generally a bit more balanced than during June, emotionally and also between doing nothing and doing things.

still not cooked more (not doing well on that one oops)

to have new experiences and visit new places- I went to Blackjacks which is kind of near to London one weekend for a retreat, I had never been there and it was a very beautiful place with a river, geese roaming around, beautiful trees, parakeets and dragonflies ❤ it was to take part in a ceremony called The Long dance. Half the night you dance anti clockwise to release negativity from yourself and the earth, and the other half you dance clockwise to bring positivity in to yourself and the earth. It’s incredibly powerful and started a deep healing process in me.  I also gave Munay Ki for the first time.

step fully into my role as a healer- no clients, but I did one womb healing at the Long Dance weekend, and 6 womb healings at another retreat I went to. also gave munay ki for first time so that comes under this as well.

activism- none unfortunately

better at birthdays- no

finish my lists- a few odd bits done

update on giving up the pill- it’s now been 4 months, I felt maybe my cycle is starting to settle a bit as I was back to 28 days.  so far they have been 29, 30, 33 and 28 days. I’m also resonating more deeply with the archetypes now. I can only describe it as somehow feeling more ‘real’

make more time for creativity- we made a banner of painted prayers for the long dance but other than that I didn’t really

to live to my cycle and educate others- thinking I am doing more so. sadly I had to cancel the Red Tent as I wasn’t sure anyone was going to turn up and it was a bit much to go to London without knowing for sure. I did a lot of womb healings during the two retreats I went to.

what else happened and what I got up to:

in shamanic course we learnt an icaro (medicine song) and burnt away roles we have taken on, and a journey called the spirit boat journey which is quite an active meditation, as you are literally imagining you are on a boat and using paddles

went to the Long Dance (as well as doing one healing myself, I also had 4 on myself, it brought up a lot for me)

did my first part one of Munay Ki for one of my free gift ones which went well i think, but think I will get better

another weekend retreat in St Osyth, the magical garden, a very epic weekend of healing myself and others

So August….facebook and twitter break (other than red tent promotion and keeping up to date with shamanic group work), more munay ki, more shamanic group work, worldwide womb blessing, wedding anniversary, red tent…so let’s see how it goes!

 

 

 

 

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June 2017 Look back

beyond the half way point of the year and have to admit I am finding this year hard…So many things have happened and my emotions have been running high…I hope I can find some solace soon…

but anyway here is here I got on with my goals for the year during the month of June..

Happiness/Divine Feminine/Balance- did do a few small things that made me happy but it’s never for long at the moment..

still haven’t cooked more..

to have new experiences and visit new places- I went on an organised butterfly walk and I hadn’t done that before..

step fully into my role as a healer- no clients at all 😦

activism- started sending news bits to Animal Justice project. My first news article is here

be better at birthdays- no

finish my lists- no

update on giving up the pill- it’s now 3 months since I stopped, this time I got quite stressed as I didn’t bleed until after 33 days. It’s still very light but not very painful. I think partly stress made me start later but also I turned 33 a few days before so maybe there’s something in the number…

make more time for creativity- sort of. I did ’30 Days Wild’ again this year so I was posting a photo every day on Instagram.

to live to my cycle and educate others- I had the 2nd red tent, which went better, I had 4 women turn up, I gave them ‘cauldron energisers’ (womb energiser), we did womb journalling questions, and a meditation for empowerment.

What else happened and I got up to:

I think I mentioned last month that I had some ‘big’ homework from the shamanic group I’m in to do city vision quests, where you had to walk in each direction and have certain questions in mind to find the answers to. I did the last 2 directions of those so that was very interesting.

I voted…

Red Tent..

had a whole horrible situation with our cat Mitzi…I wrote in previous blog so I won’t go over that again…but no longer have any cats 😦

I had organised a social here in Southend for the shamanic groups only a few days later but sadly only one person showed up…although it was a nice day..

I had some time off as it was my birthday..My friend Lauren treated me to a meal at The oaktree which was lovely (I had a lasagne and an icecream sundae), I sorted out some bits at home I needed to do, I went to see my friend Helene’s choir at Leigh Folk festival, went to a summer solstice ritual at hockley woods and on my birthday I went for organised butterfly walk at Belfairs woods which was brilliant, we saw 14 species of butterfly ❤ also had a private yoga lesson.

so July…two shamanic weekends away coming and starting to give the munay ki…

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May 17 Look Back

Half way through the year already…not quite sure how that’s happened, and I haven’t even done that much! (although Summer looks busy)

How I did with my goals and intentions through May

Happiness/Balance/Divine Feminine- mostly doing the same as previous months, although think I am finding a bit more balance.

still haven’t cooked more…

to have new experiences and visit new places- I did my first Red Tent in Hackney Wick so that was a new experience (more info later in post), and also did the first part of a ‘city vision quest’ which I was set as homework for the shamanic group.

step fully into my role as a healer- One person who had a womb healing and a blessing. I’ve started offering my 5 free Munay Ki Initiations, part of my promise of getting the rites, it’s only taken me 2 years to consider giving them!

Activism- well I did at least email The Animal Justice Project as I saw a post on Instagram that they were looking for bloggers, and after a few emails I’ve agreed to help write up news for them. So at least it’s a small bit of activism that I can do around work!

be better at birthdays- no

finish my lists- still very slowly ticking things off..

update on giving up the pill- it’s now been just over 2 months since I stopped the pill and I’ve had my second natural period. The first one was after 29 days (1 day longer than before) and the second came after 30 days, bang on the New Moon! Both times only lasted three days and were very light. There are still cramps but they seem less intense. The only difference I noticed this time was some harder emotional days beforehand, having a few days where I felt on the edge of crying all day but for no good reason. I am noticing my cycle is changing and the archetypes are moving and evolving to the difference.

make more time for creativity- not lots, but did watch a few creative videos, made a couple of small collages and two ‘found’ poems

to live to my cycle and educate others- very much so, you still can’t shut me up about this! I can’t remember if I said before but I now have a Divine Feminine altar I change every week to reflect the archetype I’m in, and I have set up a folder for my cycle tracking so that all my entries go together, so I’ll be able to look back all at ‘Day 1’ for example in one place and notice the similarities/differences straight away

What I got up to in May:

I had a few days holiday but I can’t remember what I did, mostly stuff at home I think, and visited my parents.

I had my first Red Tent in Hackney Wick and it was a hard start, as the overground wasn’t working that day, thanks to West Ham football being on, then only 2 women showed up so I couldn’t even pay half the room hire fee. But one of the women was someone I hadn’t seen for five years so that was nice, and we had a really lovely time I think. Next one is June 11th

I helped Miguel with a Munay Ki session by giving the 13th rite, the rite of the womb

I met up with my old Holland and Barrett manager Nathan for a coffee, he’s now a teacher and doing really well

Obviously I’ve been to shamanic group too, the last session we went to the woods and did journeying with the trees, and before that we learnt how to do extractions.

So not a very busy month but June and July look to be different.

June is looking like this so far: voting, next Red tent, a friends birthday party, shamanic group social, my birthday 🙂

 

 

 

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April 17 Look Back

how my goals and intentions went in April:

Balance/Happiness/Divine Feminine- not too much change on this, still doing the same things balance/divine feminine wise, and haven’t done much to make myself happy really

still haven’t cooked more!

to have new experiences and visit new places- well I experienced an energetic ‘funeral’ and visited a park in Hackney Wick I hadn’t seen before.

step fully into my role as a healer- I did two womb healings and one womb blessing

activism- still not possible unfortunately

be better at birthdays- no major birthdays this month

finish my lists- ticked a few more small things off!

give up the pill- I’d done this last month but a brief update- now been just over a month and I had my first natural period after 29 days! so only a day later than normal, and then it was only 3 days instead of 5! It was also less painful, interestingly. I had a few up/down days but not many really, so the transition has been surprisingly easy 🙂

make more time for creativity- not really

to live to my cycle and educate others- yes still doing my best to do this but it’s changing a little because I no longer take hormones, so I’m kind of relearning.

 

What I got up to in April:

I hosted my final Southend based women’s circle, and had 5 women show up! (isn’t that just typical lol) it was actually really beautiful and emotional, as we all expressed gratitude for what the group had given us. and it felt the right and honourable way to close the circle, so I was really happy with that.

Obviously still been going to the shamanic circle and we are in the West direction at the moment which is all about facing fears, and it’s been very interesting so far, and not at all what I expected in how it’s decided to play out in my life! At one of the sessions I took part in an energetic ‘funeral’ which was surreal, and made me realise how I will have no control in reality of what happens or what people feel at my funeral.

I also socialized with one of the other women from the group last week before the session, and we had a cup of tea and she showed me a big local park near by and we had a good chat so that was really nice.

I also made the decision to go on the ‘big’ wheel. that is, the ‘full’ proper version that Miguel has done, so I’ll be starting that in September, which will be  big thing, as I’ve been getting a lot of stuff come up from the ‘mini’ version so it could be very emotional and hard! but I’m sure it will be worth it. I think I will need it to help me clear things, before I can take what I think will be my next step on my path, to become a priestess.

that’s it for this month, in May I start the Red tent!

 

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March 17 Look Back

How can it be that we are already entering month four of the year??

here is what my March was like.

First how I’m doing with my goals and intentions for the year:

Balance/Happiness/Divine Feminine- balance was a bit better (most of the time) as I tried to live to my cycle but was not always possible due to other factors. Happiness, I did more that made me happy like going on a retreat and going to the cinema for the first time for years, but my moods have been all over the place to be honest. Divine feminine- have been carrying on with doing the womb healing on myself everyday, I went on a women’s retreat and I had a few clients for womb work.

To cook more- nope.

to have new experiences and visit new places- only experiences of a spiritual kind, like going on a rebirth journey at the retreat.

to do more of what makes me happy (see above)

to step fully into my role as a healer- I did one womb healing and two womb blessings. I have two blessings and a healing booked so far for April too! (I seem to be getting two womb blessings to do every month at the moment)

to do more activism- still no as actions seem to be when I’m working mostly 😦

be better at birthdays- there was no major birthdays but I took my mum to the cinema for Mother’s Day 🙂

finish my lists- ticked off a few more things 😉

give up the pill- I’ve done it! I’m now 9 days pill free. Still early days as obviously I would have had 7 days off anyway, my withdrawal bleed lasted about the same time it usually would but now I won’t when my first ‘proper’ bleed will come. So far I have had a lot of bloatedness and felt emotional today. I’ve been taking Maca powder to try and help balance my hormones.

make more time for creativity- I did write a few meditations this month

live to my cycle and educate others- yes still trying my best but hasn’t always been possible. For instant last week I was in my crone (bleeding) but I had to run the shop all week as my manager was away, so I couldn’t rest as much as I really needed 😦 damn life stuff getting in the way! now as I’ve come off the pill I’m going to have to relearn my cycles as I readjust to life without hormones.

What I got up to in March:

I booked time off the first weekend in case I could afford to go a women’s retreat a fellow moon mother was hosting in London alongside a female shamanic practitioner, and as fate would have, it was made possible for me to go! It turned out to be an amazing weekend, much more powerful than I had anticipated.

On the first day we worked with Maya the shamanic lady who led us through a rebirth journey, helped us to cleanse away old outworn feelings, and we spoke about our first menstruation and honoured each other. We made crowns and declared our ‘queendom’. On the Sunday, Mel, the moon mother led us through a day of working with the archetypes including a sound bath journey through each of the seasons which was amazing. The weekend was amazing, powerful and I made new friends and gained so much insight. So glad I went, I really needed it!

I’ve still been attending the shamanic circle and it has been great, really powerful work and making new connections too.

I took my mum to see the new Beauty and the Beast film which was brilliant, i cried several times!

Now to see what April will bring..

 

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Feb 17 look back

How the 2nd month of the year went for me..

first my goals and intentions:

Balance/Happiness/Divine Feminine: now I’ve been tracking my cycle for a few months I’m getting to know well what’s better for me in each week, and mostly I’ve been good at giving myself the space to live to this cyclic nature. Divine Feminine- I carried on with my daily energy exercise and self womb healing. I did two womb blessings and one womb healing. My circle in feb was about working with the archetypes. I also took part in the Worldwide Womb Blessing (and Miguel did The Gift)

To cook more- not done this yet

to have new experiences and visit new places- can’t think of anything specific

to do more of what makes me happy- well not that much really but been doing a lot more healing work

to step fully into my role as a healer- yes! did two womb blessings and a healing (only one on a gift or donation basis), I’ve booked another womb blessing and have replied to two other women that have contacted me about it

to do more activism- nothing yet

be better at birthdays- nothing special but I did message anyone I cared about who had a birthday in Feb!

finish my lists- haven’t had money to tick off much but ticked off a couple lol

give up the pill-1 month to go, but have been doing a lot of reading to prepare myself

make more time for creativity- yes! I made both my vision board and action board at last!

live to my cycle and educate others-ran a circle about it! as well as continuing my personal tracking and been mostly better at living to this

What I got up to:

another small group for my women’s circle but it was a good one I think learning about the archetypes of the women’s cycle

been going to the shamanic circle still and I’ve been starting to connect a bit more with the other people going, the last sessions have been about shamanic tools and plant medicine

I helped out at a Shamanic Healing Day with some of the money we made going to the Q’ero community in Peru to help towards building a community centre. We managed to raise £80

Our friend Rae visited after over a year, it was good to see them again!

We went to our friend maria’s for lunch, it was so good, and she is a lovely friend 🙂

 

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My Moon Mother/Womb Blessing Journey so far

You may remember I mentioned in a previous blog that I wanted to write a full blog about what has happened with me since becoming a Moon Mother in November, well I’ve had more and more to write as time has gone on, and now feels the time to start writing this out!

Firstly for those who may not know I will describe what a Moon Mother is. A Moon Mother is a woman initiated by Miranda Gray to be able to give personal womb blessings and womb healings. Miranda is a healer and a writer who has wrote lots of books about the female cycle and how to work with it. Eventually she channelled the gift of the Worldwide Womb Blessing, which is a free long distance version which works with the group of women as a whole, whereas the personal one works with that specific woman. The Worldwide Womb Blessings take place five times a year on a full moon with thousands of women around the world. Take a look and consider registering for the next one in May. Click here!

So what is the Womb Blessing and what is Womb Healing?

The womb blessing is a divine feminine attunement which deepens your connection to the Goddess and her healing energy. If you have a personal womb blessing, afterwards you enter a 28 day ‘rebirth’ cycle (and so does the Moon Mother giving the blessing) which helps you to release old patterns and thought patterns that no longer serve you and helps you to discover your true authentic self. The rebirth can be very subtle or it can be very strong and bring up emotions and old memories that need to be released. This is a transformative process.

Womb healing is done in person and is a nurturing process. A womb healing brings balance and healing energy to the three female energy centres of the body, and also to the four female archetypes of the cycle. As a result your cycle may find more balance and you may also find more balance in your everyday life.

Both of these can be given to all women from first menstruation, and it doesn’t matter if they have a womb or a cycle. Women in menopause and beyond, and women who don’t have a womb for medical reasons, and women who don’t have a cycle due to medical or contraceptive reasons, all can receive these healings.

If you are in the UK area and this resonates with you, then please visit our website for more information and to book http://thehealingpathways.co.uk/

Anyway enough plugging now, I want to tell you my personal journey since becoming a Moon Mother. During the weekend of becoming one, I went through many emotions as the very first womb blessing I had from one of the other trainee Moon Mothers affected me almost immediately. I must have had all the emotions there is over that weekend! We were advised not to give any womb blessings for 28 days so that we could integrate the work and our own womb blessing. During that first rebirth and integration, mostly I felt okay  but I did feel more tired and towards the end I did have some feelings come up regarding my relationship which I worked with and got through. I marked the finish by walking the labyrinth in Saffron Walden which was a beautiful way to finish and properly start my path as a Moon Mother.

In December I started to give womb healings on a gift or donation basis as a practice before fully charging. I think I did four during December and I was astounded by the results that people were reporting! One lady with suspected endometriosis had more pain the day after, but was pain free for a while afterwards. Another woman who is almost in menopause, had a period the following day after several months without. and another who had very irregular cycles  and had even had surgery to help this, noticed a big improvement after receiving the womb healing. I was, and am still pretty dumbfounded! The power of the divine feminine through this work has been amazing and what an honour to be doing this. I also noticed that by giving the healing, it also benefited me, if I was on my period, it would also help my pain! Moon Mothers can also do this healing to themselves so I have given this to myself almost every day since the training. I gave another two womb healings in January (including my first fully paid one)! and have done one this month.

Also during December I hosted my first Worldwide Womb Blessing group with a small amount of women from my women’s circle. It went really well and it was the first time I had taken part and been able to send the energy as well as receive, and that felt so powerful! I’m looking forward to hosting bigger groups later in the year.

Last month I started doing the personal womb blessings on a gift or donation basis, again to get the practice before charging properly. I did two that were one day after the other, so the cycles for those two women have now come to a close. Both experienced a lot of tiredness, and one had a lot come up emotionally also. Despite being in two rebirth cycles, again, I was mostly okay but excess tiredness and some small things came up to be dealt with. I’ve done another two this month (one fully paid)! but they have only just begun, so it’s a bit early yet to know how it’s affected them, but the common theme for me is tiredness, and I have definitely had some small things coming up again so far. I also took part in the Worldwide Womb blessing for this month but not in a group this time, but Miguel joined me and took part in ‘The Gift’ which is a gift of divine feminine energy but for men.

Now I’m sure this all sounds a lot already, but actually there is more! I found out about Moon Mothers through taking part in Worldwide Womb blessings for about a year before, but I had never read any of Miranda Gray’s books. While I was at the workshop, there were of course some of her books for sale. On the first day, I bought ‘Red Moon’ , mainly because there was a third day of the workshop for a separate fee which I wasn’t attending but was based on this book, and Miranda had mentioned briefly about the archetypes that are used in the womb healing but said she would go into detail of those on that day, so I thought I would get the book, so that I could get this knowledge even if it wasn’t in the workshop format. I actually started reading it on the way home and it’s been life changing since! On the following day I decided I would buy another book, it was a heard choice as they all looked so good but I decided to get her newest book ‘Female Energy Awakening’ which also has become part of my every day life!

Before I read these books I did track the day of my cycle and what moon phase we would be in at each day but nothing else. Since reading them I have become cycle obsessed! In Red Moon, Miranda talks about how to track your cycle, in full depth about each of the archetypes, what kind of activities might be appropriate for those stages, and includes lots of little meditations and exercises to do at different times of the month. Since reading red Moon, I have made 3 moon dials ( a record of my full cycle, noting what archetype I’m in and more)so have figured out where the archetypes appear in my cycle and what suits me best at each time. I’ve done this by everyday recording what moods I’ve been in, any ailments I’ve experienced, what activities I’ve done, what clothes I’ve worn, when I’ve made love etc, and it’s really fascinating to see how it tallies up each month! I highly recommend you read Red Moon to get the full low-down but in brief the four archetypes of the cycle are the Crone (around menstruation) where you need to rest but is highly spiritual, Maiden (after bleeding finished roughly) more energised and social-able, Mother- around ovulation, where you are more caring to others, Enchantress, not long before bleeding, more self focused and can be a bit more impatient but again very spiritual

I discovered through doing this that my archetypes were not very balanced, (2 of them were taking most of the cycle up) so I’ve decided to make it my mission to make them more balanced through the use of womb healing on my self daily, doing the right things for my cycle and working with the female energy awakening book. Female energy awakening goes into depth about the womb blessing but also includes a 28 day guide for working with your cycle which is mainly aimed for after receiving the womb blessing but I have been using it daily and have been repeating it every month. This seems to be working as I noticed a difference with my last moon dial- hooray! All you need to follow the guide is 14 black stones and 14 white stones and 2 bowls. Everyday you either put a white or black stone in a bowl depending where you are at in your cycle, and make a pledge to do something that is good for that part of your cycle that day, then there are also other little exercises to do, like meditations or wearing a bracelet that week in a certain colour. Even if you don’t have a cycle, you can work with this by following the moon phases (and the book guides you to which archetype to which phase). again, it’s been sooo interesting to see how it varies each month and what comes up.

After I did the Worldwide womb blessing in December something very strong came up for me. That I need to change my contraceptive method, as I’m now craving to have my natural cycle. At the time I had 3 months of pills left, I now have one month to go and once they are gone, I won’t be getting more. I’ve been on them since I was fourteen (I’m now 32) so I’ve been on them a very long time so haven’t had a natural cycle for very long at all, I’m not sure how it will go, but I’ve made preparations for when that time will come, and I’m looking forward to getting to know the ‘real’ me underneath the hormone control. I am however grateful for all the years I was on them as I was lucky never to have any issues and they certainly have helped me and I have no judgement on other women who want to use them, but I feel it’s time for me to move on and try something new. So will be very interesting to see what happens to my cycle afterwards!

So finally I’ve wrote this long over due blog and it’s taken me over a hour to write! I hope you find it interesting and I’m always willing to discuss this if you want to find out more, it’s one of my aims to be able to teach women about working with their cycle, so I’m learning all I can right now so in future this will be something I can offer properly.

Now to see what will happen next on my journey as a Moon Mother….

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Late again! (sorry)! January 2017 look back

Sorry it’s so late but here is my January blog (and I still have a backlog of other blogs to write)…

So first how I’m doing so far with my goals and intentions for this year..

Balance/Happiness/Divine Feminine: I’ve been working a lot with balance and divine feminine. I’ve been tracking my cycle and learning what is better for me in each week of my cycle, it’s been a bit out of balance but through regular self womb healing, listening to my body and working with on rotation a 28 day routine that’s in Miranda Gray’s book ‘Female Energy Awakening’ I’ve been slowly bringing back balance again. Also on the divine feminine part, I did two womb blessings for others in January and my circle was about working with your cycle and the archetypes.I also did two womb healings and gave the 13th rite. As for happiness, so far the year has been a bit slow and ‘meh’ but I’m sure things will pick up again soon.

To cook more- not done this yet

to have new experiences and visit new places- nothing as yet

to do more of what makes me happy- not really yet

to step fully into my role as a healer- did two womb blessings, booked two others. all gift or donation but at least it’s a start! I also did two womb healings

to do more activism- nothing yet

be better at birthdays- well it was Miguel’s birthday and I organised him a surprise shamanic fire ceremony with a few select friends, so I think that was good!

finish my lists- haven’t had money to tick off much but ticked off a couple lol

give up the pill- not yet, 2 months to go…

make more time for creativity- not yet

live to my cycle and educate others- yes as I mentioned earlier. I’m a bit obsessed with this stuff at the moment!

What I got up to

Beginning of the year was really hard, as grief was still hitting us quite hard with the loss of our cat Roxie, and that unfortunately went into anger, and extreme arguing..but eventually it died down and some normality started to come back.

I had my first women’s circle of the year which was our planning meeting, but only a small group.

I started attending the shamanic course that Miguel runs with his friend Gareth. I’m helping out with money etc, but also actually taking part. It’s every two weeks on a Tuesday evening. So far there was the introduction to the course, and last time everyone got to receive a shamanic healing, and witness what that looks like. I didn’t need that much healing apparently so that was nice! and I was told that my womb was glowing and clearly on a mission…lol.

celebrated Miguel’s birthday with a surprise fire ceremony…a very nice day

did the final part of my “redoing” of the munay ki, and as part of that I did the 13th rite- the rite of the womb for the women alongside two other women taking part. It went very well!

that’s it for now x

 

 

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Belated post: December 2016

yes I’m a bit backwards in my catching up but here is my post about the last month of 2016. (see my previous post for my look back on the whole year and look forward to the new year)

first how I did with my focus and intentions that month

key words: knowledge, health, magic and self care- magic was there for part of the month as was self care but later these took a back seat unfortunately

goals/intentions

cook more- did do some baking which is more than I’ve done in previous months!

go to Yoga classes- went to 3 classes, couldn’t go on Boxing day as I had to work earlier

walk more often- some walks, a long one on the day of the labyrinth!

not to be affected by other people’s stories/no expectations- part of month yes, partly no

manifestation skills- nothing specific

step fully into role as a healer- started doing womb healings on gift or donation basis (did 4 I think) and also hosted my first worldwide womb blessing group

to have new experiences/visit new places- part of holiday in Portugal went to places we hadn’t been before, went to my first gong bath, walked a labyrinth, took part in a ‘Free Hugs’ event

more activism- none

more of what makes me happy- did healings, went to most yoga classes, went to spiritual events, some vegan meals out

What I got up to

The last few days of our holiday to Portugal- on the Thursday we went to a big family lunch that Miguel’s sister had organised and the final day was very busy! We went out for a coffee with Miguel’s dad in the morning, had lunch out at the health food store, went to visit the Lisbon cathedral and the chapel of St Anthony which was so beautiful. We went to the Carmo Ruins, a church which was destroyed in an earthquake but is still partly up and has a museum inside which had loads of amazing artefacts inside including lots from the Inca. Had ‘Ginga’ (cherry liqueur) and ended the day with going to the best vegan restaurant I’ve been to, it was called the vegan food project. The service was brilliant and food so divine!

I booked two weeks off work for a change, so the following week I was home. In that week I did my first womb healing on a gift or donation basis for someone else, went to a gong bath, went to my friend Sherry’s ‘Soup’ event and it was my work Xmas meal which was at Prezzos in Rayleigh and although some mistakes wasn’t too bad although I don’t think I would choose to go there myself.

Then on the final day of my holiday I went to Saffron Walden and walked the labyrinth there, which was a great experience!

I had three more womb healings the week after, and hosted my first Worldwide Womb Blessing group for a small group of women from my circle. I also went to a Free Hugs event that Sherry also organised. I nearly dropped out at the last minute but I went and did an hour in the end, and think I hugged about 6 or 7 people!

We celebrated winter solstice, and then well the last week was not good as our cat Roxie had to be put to sleep and things went a bit downhill for a while.

But now onwards and upwards!

Poems I wrote

darkness is light

light is darkness

night is second sight

sight is the secret of the night

hidden in the trees

and that tingle in your knees

it comes forth into being

time to believe what you’re seeing.

Poem 2 (quite similar to the first one really)

Welcome the light

at the end of the night

it becomes second sight

there’s no need to fight

try as you might

the dark will not bite

everything will be alright

even when it seems tight.

For Roxie

I don’t want to believe it’s real

but I know by the way I feel

we really did have to say goodbye to you today

your time was up, you were no longer okay

thirteen years ago you came into our lives

a surprise gift from a friend

a beautiful tabby cat with the tail of a squirrel

we named you Roxie

you became an integral part of our family

you were there through thick and thin

you gave unconditional love without question

when food was coming, you’d come running

you would sit on our laps when we felt sad

you never judged us when we got mad

we went through the transitions of our lives together

now we’ve had to be there for your biggest transistion

onto the rainbow bridge

onto the summerland

at least you’ll listen to one hell of a band!

everyday we will miss you

and always remember every blessing you gave us

Goodbye Roxie

you were so special and you always will be

and we know one day, one lifetime

we will see you again.

Poem 4

beneath the moon I saw a shadow

a shadow, but it did not frighten me

as this shadow I needed to see.

 

because the day was rushed

I couldn’t see the finer details

the small print, the minor colours.

 

In my pocket I keep what remains of my soul

although now there is a big hole.

 

Some days disappear like they were just a dream

when you know it was more than what it seemed.

 

I want to be more like the colour red

at least then I wouldn’t dread

what’s been has been

but what’s yet to come

remains to be seen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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A look back on 2016 and a look forward to 2017

In 2015 I was a bit early in posting this post, and now I’m late posting 2016. The truth is I have lots of blogs I need to write at the moment, but this is the first chance I’ve had and felt okay to do it. The last week of 2016 and the first week of 2017 have not been good to me. The light is starting to slowly coming back but the last two weeks have been really hard, and for the first time in a long time I’ve not been okay. We had to have one of our cats put to sleep so it started with grief which then morphed into a deep depression and even anger. I felt really alone. However I am now ready to admit I was in a bad place and now is time I can pick myself up again, as the only one who can really do this is me. I have to accept things won’t always be good but they won’t always be bad either. Life is slowly on the up again and one thing I can do to help me is write! So I will slowly start to catch up on my blogs again, as I have lots to say.

let’s start with a look back on 2016..

Music

still not as prominent as it has been in the past, I don’t think I made it to any gigs this year apart from one local one- seeing my friend Ruth’s band T Bitch at their Halloween show at the Railway Hotel, which was really awesome! (it involved one member arriving in a coffin and me standing on a chair in order to see)!

I didn’t buy any new music in 2016 although I did listen to Spotify a lot and tried to diversify my listening a bit by keeping an eye on new releases and checking out their recommended playlists. I don’t think I can really pinpoint anything new in this area.

Books

I set my challenge on Good Reads to read 50 books again, but I still didn’t quite reach it, I think I read 45 or 46 so I have set it for 47 this time.

I think the best books I read were at the end of the year after my Moon Mother training. I read both Red Moon and Female Energy Awakening by Miranda Gray (who trained me). They are about women’s cycles and how to live in harmony with them. They are helping me to change my life! But I will talk more on this in another blog, but I highly recommend them to all women!

Films and TV

I didn’t see any films at the cinema this year. I’m sure I must have watched some good films but I can’t recall any!

TV Wise- Humans was still very good and Black Mirror. Also enjoyed more nature documentaries like Planet Earth.

Photos/Moments/Things I did in 2016

attempted to write a poem a day, which was half successful as a lot of days I didn’t feel inspired by the prompts in the book I was working with!

Passed my Advanced product advisor test for work

Went to see Vampires Rock!

Took part in the first round of the ‘associate of the year’ for work

went to my first Buddhist ceremony

did a meditation workshop at the EDEN conference

Poetry reading at an allotment day twice

Went to Holland

took part in ’30 Days Wild’ in June

helped out at Tower Hill Sanctuary on my birthday

attended 3 Pig Save Vigils

became the supervisor for the Rayleigh store

held my first fire ceremony

went to Whitstable beach in kent

went to a sheep sanctuary

Restarted the Munay ki

went to the Retreat animal sanctuary

became a Moon Mother

went to Portugal

walked the Saffron Walden labrinyth

held my first worldwide womb blessing group, started giving womb healings

did healing at a shamanic weekend

Miguel surprised me with a shamanic wedding blessing ceremony

took part in a free hugs weekend

 

the most popular blogs I wrote in 2016

  1. 2016 Focus and Intentions
  2. dancing barefoot may 16
  3. Essex Pig save
  4. belated post: april poems for #shewritespoetry2016
  5. 30 Days Wild Week 2 (and a bit)

how I did with my goals and intentions in 2016:

learn more about nature- nature was a big theme of 2016 so a big fat yes. 30 days wild in June really helped too!

heighten my spiritual related work- yes although not in the way I hoped, still didn’t have regular clients (mostly I had none) but I did healing work at a retreat weekend and also can now more healings as I became a Moon Mother so can now do Womb Healings and Blessings, in addition to crystal healing.

get to Peru- not yet!

honour seasons and moon more fully- not to the extent I would have liked.

cook more- nope!

go to yoga classes- yes! apart from when I had the change of jobs and couldn’t go, I have been to a lot of classes in 2016.

walk more often- beginning part of the year yes but once changed job location not so much as no longer walking distance!

better self care- I think overall I was better at resting when I needed to, and I also went to the dentist, the optician and had my well overdue smear test

not to be affected by other people’s stories/no expectations- better with no expectations but still can be very affected by other people’s stories.

harness manifestation- yes, I went from a part time to a full time job and managed to manifest a lot of the ideas I had for my women’s circle this year too.

my focus was: Knowledge, health, magic and self care. I think there was a lot of all those things!

Now finally to move forward to 2017. (a week into it, lol)

My Focus this year is: Balance, Happiness, Divine Feminine

My intentions for this year (including those I set back in October on the witches new year)

  1. To Cook more- carrying this one over as I would like to do more with this when I can
  2. to have new experiences and visit new places
  3. to do more of what makes me happy
  4. to step fully into my role as a healer – reworded as still important to me. I love doing the healing work but I need people to come to me to heal!
  5. To do more activism again -would be great to fit in where I can for causes I feel passionate about
  6. be better at birthdays- I’ve had this before too, last year partly because of lack of money part of the year I wasn’t very good at it. This year I’d like to be more organised and thoughtful
  7. finish my lists!- I am a list hoarder and that won’t ever change. However I have lists on my phone with stuff that’s been on there for ages (things to buy etc) so I want to start getting rid of those things!
  8. Give up the Pill- I’ve been on the pill for about 18 years, I’ll go into this on my blog about womb healing/cycles more but now is the time to come off and change contraception method.I’ve got 3 months left so I will use those first, and that gives me time to explore my options
  9. Live to my cycle and educate others- as I’ve already briefly mentioned (and will go deeper in another post) I’ve been learning more about women’s cycles and it is really helping me to understand myself and other women better. I want to be able to live with this cyclic nature in mind. I also want to help other women to understand the nature of their cycle
  10. make more time for creativity- whatever that is- writing, colouring, collaging…just time to create, even if just for myself.

 

 

 

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