Moonlight Phoenix has risen

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My Moon Mother/Womb Blessing Journey so far

You may remember I mentioned in a previous blog that I wanted to write a full blog about what has happened with me since becoming a Moon Mother in November, well I’ve had more and more to write as time has gone on, and now feels the time to start writing this out!

Firstly for those who may not know I will describe what a Moon Mother is. A Moon Mother is a woman initiated by Miranda Gray to be able to give personal womb blessings and womb healings. Miranda is a healer and a writer who has wrote lots of books about the female cycle and how to work with it. Eventually she channelled the gift of the Worldwide Womb Blessing, which is a free long distance version which works with the group of women as a whole, whereas the personal one works with that specific woman. The Worldwide Womb Blessings take place five times a year on a full moon with thousands of women around the world. Take a look and consider registering for the next one in May. Click here!

So what is the Womb Blessing and what is Womb Healing?

The womb blessing is a divine feminine attunement which deepens your connection to the Goddess and her healing energy. If you have a personal womb blessing, afterwards you enter a 28 day ‘rebirth’ cycle (and so does the Moon Mother giving the blessing) which helps you to release old patterns and thought patterns that no longer serve you and helps you to discover your true authentic self. The rebirth can be very subtle or it can be very strong and bring up emotions and old memories that need to be released. This is a transformative process.

Womb healing is done in person and is a nurturing process. A womb healing brings balance and healing energy to the three female energy centres of the body, and also to the four female archetypes of the cycle. As a result your cycle may find more balance and you may also find more balance in your everyday life.

Both of these can be given to all women from first menstruation, and it doesn’t matter if they have a womb or a cycle. Women in menopause and beyond, and women who don’t have a womb for medical reasons, and women who don’t have a cycle due to medical or contraceptive reasons, all can receive these healings.

If you are in the UK area and this resonates with you, then please visit our website for more information and to book http://thehealingpathways.co.uk/

Anyway enough plugging now, I want to tell you my personal journey since becoming a Moon Mother. During the weekend of becoming one, I went through many emotions as the very first womb blessing I had from one of the other trainee Moon Mothers affected me almost immediately. I must have had all the emotions there is over that weekend! We were advised not to give any womb blessings for 28 days so that we could integrate the work and our own womb blessing. During that first rebirth and integration, mostly I felt okayΒ  but I did feel more tired and towards the end I did have some feelings come up regarding my relationship which I worked with and got through. I marked the finish by walking the labyrinth in Saffron Walden which was a beautiful way to finish and properly start my path as a Moon Mother.

In December I started to give womb healings on a gift or donation basis as a practice before fully charging. I think I did four during December and I was astounded by the results that people were reporting! One lady with suspected endometriosis had more pain the day after, but was pain free for a while afterwards. Another woman who is almost in menopause, had a period the following day after several months without. and another who had very irregular cyclesΒ  and had even had surgery to help this, noticed a big improvement after receiving the womb healing. I was, and am still pretty dumbfounded! The power of the divine feminine through this work has been amazing and what an honour to be doing this. I also noticed that by giving the healing, it also benefited me, if I was on my period, it would also help my pain! Moon Mothers can also do this healing to themselves so I have given this to myself almost every day since the training. I gave another two womb healings in January (including my first fully paid one)! and have done one this month.

Also during December I hosted my first Worldwide Womb Blessing group with a small amount of women from my women’s circle. It went really well and it was the first time I had taken part and been able to send the energy as well as receive, and that felt so powerful! I’m looking forward to hosting bigger groups later in the year.

Last month I started doing the personal womb blessings on a gift or donation basis, again to get the practice before charging properly. I did two that were one day after the other, so the cycles for those two women have now come to a close. Both experienced a lot of tiredness, and one had a lot come up emotionally also. Despite being in two rebirth cycles, again, I was mostly okay but excess tiredness and some small things came up to be dealt with. I’ve done another two this month (one fully paid)! but they have only just begun, so it’s a bit early yet to know how it’s affected them, but the common theme for me is tiredness, and I have definitely had some small things coming up again so far. I also took part in the Worldwide Womb blessing for this month but not in a group this time, but Miguel joined me and took part in ‘The Gift’ which is a gift of divine feminine energy but for men.

Now I’m sure this all sounds a lot already, but actually there is more! I found out about Moon Mothers through taking part in Worldwide Womb blessings for about a year before, but I had never read any of Miranda Gray’s books. While I was at the workshop, there were of course some of her books for sale. On the first day, I bought ‘Red Moon’ , mainly because there was a third day of the workshop for a separate fee which I wasn’t attending but was based on this book, and Miranda had mentioned briefly about the archetypes that are used in the womb healing but said she would go into detail of those on that day, so I thought I would get the book, so that I could get this knowledge even if it wasn’t in the workshop format. I actually started reading it on the way home and it’s been life changing since! On the following day I decided I would buy another book, it was a heard choice as they all looked so good but I decided to get her newest book ‘Female Energy Awakening’ which also has become part of my every day life!

Before I read these books I did track the day of my cycle and what moon phase we would be in at each day but nothing else. Since reading them I have become cycle obsessed! In Red Moon, Miranda talks about how to track your cycle, in full depth about each of the archetypes, what kind of activities might be appropriate for those stages, and includes lots of little meditations and exercises to do at different times of the month. Since reading red Moon, I have made 3 moon dials ( a record of my full cycle, noting what archetype I’m in and more)so have figured out where the archetypes appear in my cycle and what suits me best at each time. I’ve done this by everyday recording what moods I’ve been in, any ailments I’ve experienced, what activities I’ve done, what clothes I’ve worn, when I’ve made love etc, and it’s really fascinating to see how it tallies up each month! I highly recommend you read Red Moon to get the full low-down but in brief the four archetypes of the cycle are the Crone (around menstruation) where you need to rest but is highly spiritual, Maiden (after bleeding finished roughly) more energised and social-able, Mother- around ovulation, where you are more caring to others, Enchantress, not long before bleeding, more self focused and can be a bit more impatient but again very spiritual

I discovered through doing this that my archetypes were not very balanced, (2 of them were taking most of the cycle up) so I’ve decided to make it my mission to make them more balanced through the use of womb healing on my self daily, doing the right things for my cycle and working with the female energy awakening book. Female energy awakening goes into depth about the womb blessing but also includes a 28 day guide for working with your cycle which is mainly aimed for after receiving the womb blessing but I have been using it daily and have been repeating it every month. This seems to be working as I noticed a difference with my last moon dial- hooray! All you need to follow the guide is 14 black stones and 14 white stones and 2 bowls. Everyday you either put a white or black stone in a bowl depending where you are at in your cycle, and make a pledge to do something that is good for that part of your cycle that day, then there are also other little exercises to do, like meditations or wearing a bracelet that week in a certain colour. Even if you don’t have a cycle, you can work with this by following the moon phases (and the book guides you to which archetype to which phase). again, it’s been sooo interesting to see how it varies each month and what comes up.

After I did the Worldwide womb blessing in December something very strong came up for me. That I need to change my contraceptive method, as I’m now craving to have my natural cycle. At the time I had 3 months of pills left, I now have one month to go and once they are gone, I won’t be getting more. I’ve been on them since I was fourteen (I’m now 32) so I’ve been on them a very long time so haven’t had a natural cycle for very long at all, I’m not sure how it will go, but I’ve made preparations for when that time will come, and I’m looking forward to getting to know the ‘real’ me underneath the hormone control. I am however grateful for all the years I was on them as I was lucky never to have any issues and they certainly have helped me and I have no judgement on other women who want to use them, but I feel it’s time for me to move on and try something new. So will be very interesting to see what happens to my cycle afterwards!

So finally I’ve wrote this long over due blog and it’s taken me over a hour to write! I hope you find it interesting and I’m always willing to discuss this if you want to find out more, it’s one of my aims to be able to teach women about working with their cycle, so I’m learning all I can right now so in future this will be something I can offer properly.

Now to see what will happen next on my journey as a Moon Mother….

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Late again! (sorry)! January 2017 look back

Sorry it’s so late but here is my January blog (and I still have a backlog of other blogs to write)…

So first how I’m doing so far with my goals and intentions for this year..

Balance/Happiness/Divine Feminine: I’ve been working a lot with balance and divine feminine. I’ve been tracking my cycle and learning what is better for me in each week of my cycle, it’s been a bit out of balance but through regular self womb healing, listening to my body and working with on rotation a 28 day routine that’s in Miranda Gray’s book ‘Female Energy Awakening’ I’ve been slowly bringing back balance again. Also on the divine feminine part, I did two womb blessings for others in January and my circle was about working with your cycle and the archetypes.I also did two womb healings and gave the 13th rite. As for happiness, so far the year has been a bit slow and ‘meh’ but I’m sure things will pick up again soon.

To cook more- not done this yet

to have new experiences and visit new places- nothing as yet

to do more of what makes me happy- not really yet

to step fully into my role as a healer- did two womb blessings, booked two others. all gift or donation but at least it’s a start! I also did two womb healings

to do more activism- nothing yet

be better at birthdays- well it was Miguel’s birthday and I organised him a surprise shamanic fire ceremony with a few select friends, so I think that was good!

finish my lists- haven’t had money to tick off much but ticked off a couple lol

give up the pill- not yet, 2 months to go…

make more time for creativity- not yet

live to my cycle and educate others- yes as I mentioned earlier. I’m a bit obsessed with this stuff at the moment!

What I got up to

Beginning of the year was really hard, as grief was still hitting us quite hard with the loss of our cat Roxie, and that unfortunately went into anger, and extreme arguing..but eventually it died down and some normality started to come back.

I had my first women’s circle of the year which was our planning meeting, but only a small group.

I started attending the shamanic course that Miguel runs with his friend Gareth. I’m helping out with money etc, but also actually taking part. It’s every two weeks on a Tuesday evening. So far there was the introduction to the course, and last time everyone got to receive a shamanic healing, and witness what that looks like. I didn’t need that much healing apparently so that was nice! and I was told that my womb was glowing and clearly on a mission…lol.

celebrated Miguel’s birthday with a surprise fire ceremony…a very nice day

did the final part of my “redoing” of the munay ki, and as part of that I did the 13th rite- the rite of the womb for the women alongside two other women taking part. It went very well!

that’s it for now x

 

 

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Belated post: December 2016

yes I’m a bit backwards in my catching up but here is my post about the last month of 2016. (see my previous post for my look back on the whole year and look forward to the new year)

first how I did with my focus and intentions that month

key words: knowledge, health, magic and self care- magic was there for part of the month as was self care but later these took a back seat unfortunately

goals/intentions

cook more- did do some baking which is more than I’ve done in previous months!

go to Yoga classes- went to 3 classes, couldn’t go on Boxing day as I had to work earlier

walk more often- some walks, a long one on the day of the labyrinth!

not to be affected by other people’s stories/no expectations- part of month yes, partly no

manifestation skills- nothing specific

step fully into role as a healer- started doing womb healings on gift or donation basis (did 4 I think) and also hosted my first worldwide womb blessing group

to have new experiences/visit new places- part of holiday in Portugal went to places we hadn’t been before, went to my first gong bath, walked a labyrinth, took part in a ‘Free Hugs’ event

more activism- none

more of what makes me happy- did healings, went to most yoga classes, went to spiritual events, some vegan meals out

What I got up to

The last few days of our holiday to Portugal- on the Thursday we went to a big family lunch that Miguel’s sister had organised and the final day was very busy! We went out for a coffee with Miguel’s dad in the morning, had lunch out at the health food store, went to visit the Lisbon cathedral and the chapel of St Anthony which was so beautiful. We went to the Carmo Ruins, a church which was destroyed in an earthquake but is still partly up and has a museum inside which had loads of amazing artefacts inside including lots from the Inca. Had ‘Ginga’ (cherry liqueur) and ended the day with going to the best vegan restaurant I’ve been to, it was called the vegan food project. The service was brilliant and food so divine!

I booked two weeks off work for a change, so the following week I was home. In that week I did my first womb healing on a gift or donation basis for someone else, went to a gong bath, went to my friend Sherry’s ‘Soup’ event and it was my work Xmas meal which was at Prezzos in Rayleigh and although some mistakes wasn’t too bad although I don’t think I would choose to go there myself.

Then on the final day of my holiday I went to Saffron Walden and walked the labyrinth there, which was a great experience!

I had three more womb healings the week after, and hosted my first Worldwide Womb Blessing group for a small group of women from my circle. I also went to a Free Hugs event that Sherry also organised. I nearly dropped out at the last minute but I went and did an hour in the end, and think I hugged about 6 or 7 people!

We celebrated winter solstice, and then well the last week was not good as our cat Roxie had to be put to sleep and things went a bit downhill for a while.

But now onwards and upwards!

Poems I wrote

darkness is light

light is darkness

night is second sight

sight is the secret of the night

hidden in the trees

and that tingle in your knees

it comes forth into being

time to believe what you’re seeing.

Poem 2 (quite similar to the first one really)

Welcome the light

at the end of the night

it becomes second sight

there’s no need to fight

try as you might

the dark will not bite

everything will be alright

even when it seems tight.

For Roxie

I don’t want to believe it’s real

but I know by the way I feel

we really did have to say goodbye to you today

your time was up, you were no longer okay

thirteen years ago you came into our lives

a surprise gift from a friend

a beautiful tabby cat with the tail of a squirrel

we named you Roxie

you became an integral part of our family

you were there through thick and thin

you gave unconditional love without question

when food was coming, you’d come running

you would sit on our laps when we felt sad

you never judged us when we got mad

we went through the transitions of our lives together

now we’ve had to be there for your biggest transistion

onto the rainbow bridge

onto the summerland

at least you’ll listen to one hell of a band!

everyday we will miss you

and always remember every blessing you gave us

Goodbye Roxie

you were so special and you always will be

and we know one day, one lifetime

we will see you again.

Poem 4

beneath the moon I saw a shadow

a shadow, but it did not frighten me

as this shadow I needed to see.

 

because the day was rushed

I couldn’t see the finer details

the small print, the minor colours.

 

In my pocket I keep what remains of my soul

although now there is a big hole.

 

Some days disappear like they were just a dream

when you know it was more than what it seemed.

 

I want to be more like the colour red

at least then I wouldn’t dread

what’s been has been

but what’s yet to come

remains to be seen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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A look back on 2016 and a look forward to 2017

In 2015 I was a bit early in posting this post, and now I’m late posting 2016. The truth is I have lots of blogs I need to write at the moment, but this is the first chance I’ve had and felt okay to do it. The last week of 2016 and the first week of 2017 have not been good to me. The light is starting to slowly coming back but the last two weeks have been really hard, and for the first time in a long time I’ve not been okay. We had to have one of our cats put to sleep so it started with grief which then morphed into a deep depression and even anger. I felt really alone. However I am now ready to admit I was in a bad place and now is time I can pick myself up again, as the only one who can really do this is me. I have to accept things won’t always be good but they won’t always be bad either. Life is slowly on the up again and one thing I can do to help me is write! So I will slowly start to catch up on my blogs again, as I have lots to say.

let’s start with a look back on 2016..

Music

still not as prominent as it has been in the past, I don’t think I made it to any gigs this year apart from one local one- seeing my friend Ruth’s band T Bitch at their Halloween show at the Railway Hotel, which was really awesome! (it involved one member arriving in a coffin and me standing on a chair in order to see)!

I didn’t buy any new music in 2016 although I did listen to Spotify a lot and tried to diversify my listening a bit by keeping an eye on new releases and checking out their recommended playlists. I don’t think I can really pinpoint anything new in this area.

Books

I set my challenge on Good Reads to read 50 books again, but I still didn’t quite reach it, I think I read 45 or 46 so I have set it for 47 this time.

I think the best books I read were at the end of the year after my Moon Mother training. I read both Red Moon and Female Energy Awakening by Miranda Gray (who trained me). They are about women’s cycles and how to live in harmony with them. They are helping me to change my life! But I will talk more on this in another blog, but I highly recommend them to all women!

Films and TV

I didn’t see any films at the cinema this year. I’m sure I must have watched some good films but I can’t recall any!

TV Wise- Humans was still very good and Black Mirror. Also enjoyed more nature documentaries like Planet Earth.

Photos/Moments/Things I did in 2016

attempted to write a poem a day, which was half successful as a lot of days I didn’t feel inspired by the prompts in the book I was working with!

Passed my Advanced product advisor test for work

Went to see Vampires Rock!

Took part in the first round of the ‘associate of the year’ for work

went to my first Buddhist ceremony

did a meditation workshop at the EDEN conference

Poetry reading at an allotment day twice

Went to Holland

took part in ’30 Days Wild’ in June

helped out at Tower Hill Sanctuary on my birthday

attended 3 Pig Save Vigils

became the supervisor for the Rayleigh store

held my first fire ceremony

went to Whitstable beach in kent

went to a sheep sanctuary

Restarted the Munay ki

went to the Retreat animal sanctuary

became a Moon Mother

went to Portugal

walked the Saffron Walden labrinyth

held my first worldwide womb blessing group, started giving womb healings

did healing at a shamanic weekend

Miguel surprised me with a shamanic wedding blessing ceremony

took part in a free hugs weekend

 

the most popular blogs I wrote in 2016

  1. 2016 Focus and Intentions
  2. dancing barefoot may 16
  3. Essex Pig save
  4. belated post: april poems for #shewritespoetry2016
  5. 30 Days Wild Week 2 (and a bit)

how I did with my goals and intentions in 2016:

learn more about nature- nature was a big theme of 2016 so a big fat yes. 30 days wild in June really helped too!

heighten my spiritual related work- yes although not in the way I hoped, still didn’t have regular clients (mostly I had none) but I did healing work at a retreat weekend and also can now more healings as I became a Moon Mother so can now do Womb Healings and Blessings, in addition to crystal healing.

get to Peru- not yet!

honour seasons and moon more fully- not to the extent I would have liked.

cook more- nope!

go to yoga classes- yes! apart from when I had the change of jobs and couldn’t go, I have been to a lot of classes in 2016.

walk more often- beginning part of the year yes but once changed job location not so much as no longer walking distance!

better self care- I think overall I was better at resting when I needed to, and I also went to the dentist, the optician and had my well overdue smear test

not to be affected by other people’s stories/no expectations- better with no expectations but still can be very affected by other people’s stories.

harness manifestation- yes, I went from a part time to a full time job and managed to manifest a lot of the ideas I had for my women’s circle this year too.

my focus was: Knowledge, health, magic and self care. I think there was a lot of all those things!

Now finally to move forward to 2017. (a week into it, lol)

My Focus this year is: Balance, Happiness, Divine Feminine

My intentions for this year (including those I set back in October on the witches new year)

  1. To Cook more- carrying this one over as I would like to do more with this when I can
  2. to have new experiences and visit new places
  3. to do more of what makes me happy
  4. to step fully into my role as a healer – reworded as still important to me. I love doing the healing work but I need people to come to me to heal!
  5. To do more activism again -would be great to fit in where I can for causes I feel passionate about
  6. be better at birthdays- I’ve had this before too, last year partly because of lack of money part of the year I wasn’t very good at it. This year I’d like to be more organised and thoughtful
  7. finish my lists!- I am a list hoarder and that won’t ever change. However I have lists on my phone with stuff that’s been on there for ages (things to buy etc) so I want to start getting rid of those things!
  8. Give up the Pill- I’ve been on the pill for about 18 years, I’ll go into this on my blog about womb healing/cycles more but now is the time to come off and change contraception method.I’ve got 3 months left so I will use those first, and that gives me time to explore my options
  9. Live to my cycle and educate others- as I’ve already briefly mentioned (and will go deeper in another post) I’ve been learning more about women’s cycles and it is really helping me to understand myself and other women better. I want to be able to live with this cyclic nature in mind. I also want to help other women to understand the nature of their cycle
  10. make more time for creativity- whatever that is- writing, colouring, collaging…just time to create, even if just for myself.

 

 

 

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Purity and Grace- November 2016

Sorry for such a delay in posting this, I was on holiday last week and this is the first chance I’ve had to properly post!

My key words for the year: Knowledge, health, magic and self care.

In November, I finally completed my Moon Mother training, so I am now able to do womb healings and blessings (more info further in post) so this certainly counts towards ‘Magic!’ and ‘Knowledge’. I’ve been going to yoga regularly again too so ‘health’ also applies.

My goals/intentions

To cook more- still not really

To go to Yoga classes- I went to two classes, as on week I had to work earlier and the other Monday left I was away!

walk more often- did a fair bit while away!

not to be affected by other people’s stories/no expectations- not so good at first part but not too bad at not having expectations

manifestation skills- finally got to the Moon Mother workshop πŸ™‚

new intentions set on Samhain

to step fully into my role as a healer- now have completed Moon Mother training, which I’m hoping will be a big thing for me

to have new experiences and visit new places- went to see some new things while in Portugal, did the Moon Mother training, went to a different animal sanctuary, went to the St Matthews meditation group for the first time.

to do more activism- took part in a volunteer day at an animal sanctuary

to do more of what makes me happy- went to a meditation group, did yoga classes, went to an animal sanctuary, Moon Mother training, went to Portugal, ran my circle

What I got up to

There is a monthly meditation group that takes place at a local church I’ve been meaning to go for ages and in November our friend Gareth was doing a crystal meditation with clear quartz, so I went along to that.

I went with my friend Rosie and her boyfriend, and another new activist friend I met on that day called Matthew to the Retreat Animal Rescue in Kent for a volunteer day. It was quite a cold, dirty and hard work day but also filled with beautiful animals, so it was very rewarding and special. Can’t wait to visit again one day!

retreat23

The Moon Mother training I did was a full weekend in London which I had booked in to do over a year ago and it finally arrived. The training is done by Miranda Gray, who does the Worldwide Womb Blessings. It was the first time she has taught in the UK for four years so it was very special to get to be there and become one of many Moon Mothers around the world. Moon Mothers can help to send the energy during the Worldwide Womb Blessings as well as conducting personal womb blessings and healings for others. I am the moment running through a few ‘practice’ sessions of the womb healing and then I will be offering to the public for a set price, and then I will be doing the same with the Womb Blessings. It was a very special and emotional weekend, and I really felt this is something I am meant to do. Have a look at the links I have provided (clickable on selected words in this paragraph) to find out more or you can contact me directly and I will tell you all you need to know. If anything, I would highly recommend taking part in the Worldwide Womb Blessing, it’s free and deepens your connection to the Divine Feminine.

moonmother

I went to the 2nd part of my ‘redoing’ of the Munay Ki initations, and I did feel the energy a lot more this time.

I ran my circle, which was a small one in November with only 2 women attending, and was on the theme of ‘Emotional Sensitivity and Empathy’ and went very well.

We went to Portugal on the 28th, so we were there the remaining days of November and the beginning of December. On the Monday we stayed with Miguel’s dad, so it was a fairly relaxed day as we had a very early start, and then from Tuesday onwards we went and stayed in an apartment we rented from Air BnB which was small but well equipped. On the Tuesday, Miguel met up with a baby sitter from his childhood and then we met his sister and got to see her new jewellery studio which was very nice and had a coffee. We were still quite tired so there wasn’t much time to do much else.

Wednesday we got up really early so went out and walked by the river and saw lots of stone statues which were pretty cool, it was raining but we visited the Tower of Belem, and briefly saw the outside of a chapel called the Monastery of Jeronimos but it wasn’t quite open when we got there and there was a lot of gypsies trying to sell umbrellas so we didn’t stay long! We then went to a famous cafe where they make the traditional portugese cake Pastel de Nata,(and have been for years and years) which obviously I couldn’t have but Miguel did. We then met Inge (Miguel’s sister) for lunch at an organic supermarket place with a restaurant attached. We went back to the apartment for a bit before going back out later and it was like the centre had come alive, it was busy, lots of street performers, and even though we don’t celebrate Xmas, we enjoyed the lights and even did some silly photos! Then we went to a restaurant called Jardim das cerejas which was an all vegan buffett, which was nice but could have been a little warmer.

Will tell you the last 2 days of Portugal in my next month round up! πŸ˜‰

Poems in November

A Beautiful Candle Dances Eternally Faithful gathering Hope in Joy Kisses Like Mountains Never Opening Pages Quite Right Sunshine Time Universal Very Whimsical yet Zealous

A cauldron of possibility, fresh like the stars, cinnamon and spice, dreams of something nice, Lunar landscapes, hiding within diamond shaped rooms, welcome to what’s in my head, or at least that’s what she said…

When the rain clears, I will be able to see you again, for now I cannot face the pain, of what that might bring, the fears, the tears, of what might happen when you are near, I don’t want to be hurt, I need the sunshine to come, to know it’s okay, and it will happen one day..

 

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October 2016 and Witches New Year (looking back then forward again)

Okay so let’s start with how the year ended for me..how did October go?

My key words for the year: Knowledge, health, magic and self care. With regards to health and self care, I have been able to start attending yoga again, and I also went to my dentist 6 month check up.

My goals/Intentions

To heighten my spiritual work- no clients 😦

To get to Peru- nope

To honour seasons and moon more fully- I did my usual things on New moon and full moon, and I think I did celebrate Samhain fully. I got to wear fancy dress at work, I went to a Halloween themed gig, hosted my women’s circle on the night, and today went to visit my nan’s grave and I’ve also done my big reading for the year ahead

To cook more- nope

to go to Yoga classes- went to 3 classes this month, yay!

walk more often- still been doing longer walks on days off

not to be effected by other people’s stories/no expectations- think I’ve mostly been okay with this

manifestation skills- can’t think of anything specific

What I got up to

I went to an open day at a local yoga studio, I got to try a sample ‘anti aging’ class which I didn’t really like as it was far too energetic for Yoga, it even involved star jumps! I also tried a meditation session (relaxing) and a drumming and chanting session which was great, saw lots of friends there too which was nice.

I went to visit my friend Sherry and meet her newest additions- two adorable kittens! πŸ™‚

I went along to the Munay Ki part one workshop Miguel ran in London because I’ve decided to try again with Munay Ki, as I didn’t feel I was getting the full benefit of it despite receiving it over a year ago, but it was when Miguel was first doing it and was all in one go. So hopefully this time I can integrate the rites better and get more out of it.

Went to see my friend’s band ‘T Bitch‘ at the Railway Hotel for Halloween and they were awesome!

Poems

Making Love to the Moon

Oh beautiful moon
Odd, how you make my heart go boom
Of all the sights
You open my mind to new heights
Your gentle glow reminds me every thing’s okay
You inspire me with what to say
On a full moon night
I’m guided by your light
We flow together like the ocean and it’s tides
Knowing each phase brings out our different sides
We are one
Knowing our cycle is never truly done
Full and Flowing
to Dark and Knowing
not everyone can understand
This connection we have
goes beyond sharing a solar system
With us, there is truly no distance.

Autumn

I almost saw you change
from green to orange
orange to brown
falling to the ground
time to let go of what once was
time to go within and see what’s inside
feel what my ancestors have to say
dive deep and reveal
the diamonds in the dark
show me your pain
as the sunshine turns to rain
this is the beginning of the end
Now is the time for us to mend.

So as a pagan, that’s another year ended for me. Overall I think the past 12 months have been pretty good. I got a promotion in my job and I’ve had a few exciting day trips and a holiday to The Hague. I didn’t manage to get any regular healing clients still or go to Peru, but I did go to Yoga quite a bit (I couldn’t for a while because of overtime) and walked loads before I moved job location and I achieved the manifestation as I got a promotion and Migs now has a lot more work, we are managing a lot better now. I’ve also managed to manifest ideas I had for my women’s circle into being like the fire ceremony and the day trip to Whitstable. I did set other goals in January but I will keep those going until the new calendar year as I usually do.

 

So my intentions I’ve set (for now) for the following year are:

  1. To step fully into my role as a healer- so this is one of my goals of last year reworded as this is still important to me. I love to do my healing work but I’m not getting much chance to practice it at the moment! This month I am adding another string to my bow by becoming a Moon Mother, so I’ll be able to also offer womb blessings and Divine Feminine Awakening healings. I hope that will help me get some more work. I will try better this year now things have settled more with my new role to promote the other work I do.
  2. To have new experiences and visit new places- I love adventures and I think more will be possible now! There’s so many places I’d like to visit and things I’d like to do so rather than name all those, I’m putting this intent out there to see where it leads me…
  3. To do more Activism- I used to do a lot more activism and I have been doing a bit more again this year but not as much as I’d like so I would like to try and get more active again for the many causes I care about.#
  4. To do more of what makes me happy- there has been some months where I’ve not seemed to do much other than work, eat, sleep, food shopping and I don’t want that! Life is for living after all!

 

 

 

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Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked…September 2016

I know I’ve said this almost every month but how can another month be gone, how can we now be in Autumn???

Once again it’s time for my monthly check in of my yearly goals, and a little update in what’s been going on in my world.

KNOWLEDGE- I don’t think there’s been much specific to do with this focus in September, other than having to learn lots of things I hadn’t done before at work!

HEALTH- due to overworking most of the month, no focus on this, think I might have even gained a little weight 😦

MAGIC-also not a big focus really

SELF CARE- think it’s only as the month finished that I started doing this more, I did finally get to the opticians though after 5 years! However there is not much of a change, one eye is very slightly weaker than the other but that’s it

To heighten my spiritual ‘work’- no clients at all again, but I put no effort in this, and I didn’t really have a lot of time in between my ‘proper’ job!

To get to Peru- I think we know this isn’t happening this year now. But we did just book a holiday to Portugal- hooray!

To honour seasons and moon- usual full and new moon activities, also took part in an online ritual for the new moon, changed my altar for Autumn Equinox

To cook more- another fail unfortunately..

to go to Yoga classes- 1 class again as I was on holiday for 1 week as my work hours meant I couldn’t go but we have finally filled the vacancy at work so hopefully I can start going every week again now!

walk more often- made more time for longer walks on days off

not to be effected by other people’s stories- mostly okay I think

have no expectations- mostly okay too

manifestation skills- manifested a beautiful day for my circle’s road trip to Whitstable as well as the perfect amount of people to go, also a lift to an animal sanctuary and more sunny weather!

WHAT I GOT UP TO

a bit pants as I worked really a lot! We still had a vacancy so I was doing extra hours because of that, and then I had to run the store one week as the manager was on holiday and I had to work 7 days in a row!

But somehow I did manage to squeeze in some nice things..

For my women’s circle monthly meet up we had planned a road trip to Whitstable beach in Kent to do some beach combing. It turned out to be a lovely warm day, I saw my friend Diana (who now lives in Kent), we found really interesting stones, did a ritual on the beach for the Standing Rock protest in Dakota, and even managed to find vegan chocolate cake!!

love

I went to another Pig Save protest, on a very hot day. It was much harder going this time as I saw the pigs a lot clearer this time, at one point one looked directly at me and I couldn’t help but cry. It is hard to do, but it means a great deal to me just to give those pigs some comfort and compassion before they go to slaughter even if it’s just one last moment.

I met up with my friend Sara at Priory Park and we stopped by some community event that was happening there, lots of stalls of groups and stuff that are in Southend. It was okay but it was mostly enjoyable to sit in the park and chat to Sara.

I went to the optician (exciting not lol) I went along one evening to one of the shamanic circles my husband runs in London as they were doing a special evening that was basically a shamanic sound bath, and was really enjoyable!

It was my friend Lauren’s birthday and she decided to go to a small sheep sanctuary in Kent, I managed to get a lift and spent the day with lots of vegan lovelies. It was another sunny day. The sheep were so cute and there was plenty of vegan food- a bbq, cake and even scones!

dsc_0043

I had the last week of September off but I didn’t do much other than visit my parents and my grandad and go to Yoga! But I guess that’s what I needed!

Poems

again, not a particular inspired month for the poem a day challenge but here are the ones I was happy with:

I would make your dreams come true

I would spread them around you with love

and make sure you are safe and protected

I would make them come true just to make you happy

No matter what the circumstances

as long as you would smile

that’s all that would matter

I would not fight

whatever was right

my love is real

and this way you’ll know how I feel

there would be no doubt

I would close your eyes but help you to see

wherever you’ll truly meant to be

I would think of you every day

knowing things were going your way

I would make you comfortable and secure

I would give you everything

that you desire

in the hope that dreams become shared.

Poem 2

Thinking about it for me there is not many things

that really make me sing

I guess the only thing would be old diaries and notebooks

which no one else would give a second look

but for me they hold memories of many years

years of laughter, joy and sometimes tears

pen to paper

memories to read back later

but that’s all I really keep

but all the rest goes deep

it’s all inside

experiences are what matters to me

objects are just pretty to see

I’d rather live

than worry about physical things I can give

I want people to remember me for me

make a difference to someone’s life

with kindness not with stuff.

 

 

 

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Diamonds and Guns..August 2016

Sorry for the delay in posting this. How can summer be coming to an end already??

How I’ve been doing with my goals and intentions during August..

KNOWLEDGE- I still regularly try to identify nature when I find something new but I haven’t had as much time as I would have liked.

HEALTH- a bit on the back burner really haven’t been able to do much of my usual exercise and lots of long hours means I get a bit lazy about what I eat too…

MAGIC- had a magical shamanic weekend in St Osyth πŸ™‚

SELF CARE- this has also slipped because of work, really need to make more effort to make some relaxing time which doesn’t just involve sleeping!

To heighten my spiritual work- I had no clients this month 😦 however I was a healing assistant at the shamanic retreat I went to, so I did do some healing on people there.

To get to Peru- I think other smaller trips are being planned first!

To honour seasons and moon- did my usual new moon and full moon work, and as it happened my women’s circle fell on the festival of Lammas, and we did a fire ceremony.

To cook more- I did make some cakes for the first time in ages!

go to Yoga classes- went to one class but only because I was on holiday that week, still can’t go around my work hours at the moment 😦

walk more often- less than I used to but did go for a few on days off

Not to be affected by other people’s stories- mostly ok I think.

have no expectations- think I’ve been okay with this.

manifestation skills- manifested somewhere to host a fire ceremony and a dry evening for it!Β  also manifested some days of work hitting target etc

WHAT I GOT UP TO

I had a week off work so took the time to do a few things at home and relax a bit. I went to my yoga class, I had my women’s circle and I held a fire ceremony for the first time and it went really well! I went to see my parents and then to end the week it was my weekend in St Osyth for an amazing shamanic retreat. I worked as a healing assistant this time and I also had a lovely surprise from Miguel of a blessing of our handfasting as it was not long before our 7 year wedding anniversary.

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I went to see my grandad and his lovely dog Lulu one day.

It was a month of fire ceremonies as my friend Susan held a fire for a few friends although it wasn’t a really ceremony just a joyful get together and I also made a new friend on the night too who is interested in joining my women’s circle as well πŸ™‚

It was our anniversary so on the Sunday before we went to The Railway Hotel for lunch and had a very tasty vegan ‘bacon’ polenta with avocado salad πŸ™‚

We had a small circle social at another member’s house and it was a really nice evening.

I had to work one day at the Wickford store and it was horrible as it was sooo quiet as it’s a new store so people are still getting to know it’s there, and there was no other jobs to do either!

We had lunch again at the Railway a few days ago and this time I had a smoky tofu stir fry.

POEMS

hardly wrote any I don’t think, still not been very inspired by the daily prompts 😦

Amsterdam

A little house

Miguel and I were given

Seven years ago on our honeymoon

the hotel presented us with

endearing, they also gave us a clock

reminders of our stay

days of newly wedded bliss

adventures in amsterdam

married and in love.

Untitled and Unfinished

Long gone are my festival days

me and muddy fields have gone our separate ways

But the memories remain

of dancing in the rain

of not sleeping in our tiny tent

of all the pegs we bent

drinking premixed vodka and coke

meeting extremely random folk…

 

 

 

 

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Radar Love- July 2016

Wow, this year is going to fast, can’t believe we are in August already! (and the sky outside today isn’t convincing me either) So time for another update of what I’ve been up to, July was a good month. But first how I did with my goals and intentions for the year..

KNOWLEDGE- since I got the nature finder app during 30 Days wild in June, I’ve been identifying wildlife and flowers regularly, I love it!

HEALTH- not been so good this month, as I started working in Rayleigh in July, I can’t walk to work anymore. I’ve done a few walks but not as much.

MAGIC- nothing specific I can think of

SELF CARE- I’m adapting to full time hours again, so haven’t been always been keeping to plans I’ve made because of tiredness.

To heighten my spiritual work- had one client, and also did some free readings on our business page on the full moon as it’s good practice.

To get to Peru- not there yet!

To honour the seasons and the moon- did usual new moon and full moon things. Lammas is today but I went to a ritual for it on Saturday.

To cook more- still haven’t!

go to Yoga classes- didn’t go to any in July, my work hours at the moment haven’t allowed me to 😦

walk more often- got less as mentioned before

not to be affected by other people’s stories- been ok with this I think

have no expectations- mostly ok with this too

manifestation skills- started my promotion a week earlier than planned!

WHAT I GOT UP TO

I had a belated birthday party as a lot of people couldn’t come on my actual birthday and Migs was away that weekend. I had a rainbow/80’s theme, there was only a few of us but it was really fun, we did 80s karaoke!Β  We were all completely sober too, lol!

I went to a Southend Vegans (a facebook group I’m on) meet up at The Railway Hotel, met some lovely new people but also knew a lot of people there too and everyone was super nice.

Started my job at Rayleigh a week earlier than planned as they were so desperate for staff! So it was all very sudden! I had to move a few plans about, as I now work Saturdays instead of Sundays.

I had a leaving drinks meet up (a week after I left because of all the sudden-ness of it) It was a fun night

I had my circle but as I had to move the day, there was only two of us. It was still nice though as we went to Priory Park and the theme was nature. It was a really warm day too.

I went to a poetry day at a community allotment my friend Fiona is involved with. It was another beautiful day spent with friends and nature.

I went to a Lammas ritual hosted by members of the local pagan moot I occasionally attend.

Busier month and I’m excited about this month too- got a fire ceremony tonight, away at the weekend, wedding anniversary coming up and other fun things too- yay πŸ™‚

POEMS

my poems everyday for a year thing isn’t going great, I didn’t write any I was happy with or even bits of poems last month but I think I had a few this month so will put them here..haven’t felt inspired by the prompts lately.

Poem 1- Apology

I’d like to apologise on behalf of the human race

That we’re destroying the planet at an incredible pace

I’m so sorry for all the trees chopped down

All the pollution gives me a frown

I’m so sorry that there is animal abuse

and I’m sorry people’s ethics are so loose

I’d like to apologise on behalf of the human race

before the world disappears without a trace…

Poem 2- Reasons to be happy (unfinished)

Because the sun is shining today

because ultimately it will all be okay

Because worrying is a waste of time

Because I’m making the effort to make this rhyme

Because the birds are singing a beautiful song

Because it’s better than focusing on what’s wrong..

Poem 3 (unfinished)

Why are you alone?

Do you wish to be on your own?

Or are you lonely, staring out to sea?

I’m here contemplating life’s journey

Shall I row on or shall I stop and admire the view?

Poem 4

She fell into a forest
Head first, into the trees
for miles she could see
an everlasting trail
of what could ever be
fragile existence of life
untouched yet disturbed
by humanity’s deep disgrace
a truth we must learn to face
by looking within
only then will we know our deepest sin

 

 

 

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Essex Pig Save

 

I heard about ‘Pig Save’ through a friend who posted about it on social media. Intrigued, I wanted to know more. On the event I found on Facebook, it immediately drew me in. The idea was to go to slaughterhouses, hopefully stop the vans for a few minutes, provide comfort to the pigs either by giving water or/and a little love, but also to document what the reality really looks like by capturing them on film and photos which can then be shared widely to try to spread awareness. I’ve been to protests many times but not any as direct as this one. Part of what made me want to take part was they described it as a ‘love based’ approach. So, instead of getting angry (although of course we are), instead just focusing on the pigs. Comfort and awareness are the main aims as I understand it.

I knew it would be quite upsetting to see, but I just knew that I had to do this. The movement originally started in Toronto in 2010. Anita Krajnc, the woman who started it was actually charged for ‘criminal mischief’ for giving water to pigs suffering during a summer heatwave and so the slogan ‘compassion is not a crime’ was created.

The movement started to grow and the first UK based Pig Save was in Manchester. Inspired by this, Essex Pig Save was born.

I didn’t make it to the first event but I was determined I would make it to the 2nd event despite it being a little further afield from me. I liked that on the event they encouraged people that would struggle to get there to post so that lifts could be organised. I posted to say I would need some help getting there and it didn’t take long for a kind soul to offer myself and a few others in a similar area a lift as long as we could get to Rayleigh train station.

On the day I had to get up very early as I needed to be at the station by 7.15am as the vigil started at 8am. (on a Monday morning). I got in the car with 3 other vegan ladies and we made our way to Cheale meats. It didn’t take long to spot the slaughterhouse, as just looking it as we went past it, it looked somewhat creepy and there was a horrible energy about it, and that was before we knew for sure! When we got there we weren’t sure where to park so we tried to park somewhere and a man came out shouting at us until we were told where we could go, just a little more up the road. As where it was, was pretty much near a main road. I had felt okay about it all, but as soon as I had got to Rayleigh I had begun feeling a bit queasy and when we got out of the car I felt really sick and nervous.

It eased my mind a bit when I saw there was quite a few of us (about 20 I think) and a few familiar faces. We stood with placards with an image of a dog and a pig saying ‘why eat one but love the other’. There were two police and the owner just outside of the slaughterhouse. As the events are public on Facebook, they know when we will come. At the first event there were a lot more police but since they saw the group was quite peaceful they obviously realised they didn’t need so many.

demo

Then it was just a case of waiting for the trucks to arrive. I can’t remember how long it took for the first one to arrive, maybe about an hour. Annoyingly the slats were up so we couldn’t see the pigs. Clearly they had been instructed to do this. There was another one I think after that, again with the slats up. It was pretty frustrating. Then a much smaller van with only a few young pigs rolled in which we could have got to easily. We tried to get it to stop but there was no chance. We had a sign saying ‘Please stop for two minutes. we just want to see the pigs’ which someone would hold so the driver could see and some of us would go round the front to try and get the vans to stop.

With the next one, again the slats were up but a few of us were tall enough to get footage from the upper slat just about this time. I couldn’t see anything and did attempt to film but didn’t get any decent footage. We had been hearing pigs screaming now and again in the distance from the slaughterhouse but with this van just before it went in, we heard a blood curling scream come from the van. It sounded like pure pain. It was horrible. One of my friends I came with started to cry so I gave her a little comfort.

The very last one I saw before we went, finally didn’t have the slats up so I could finally see although I still didn’t manage to catch footage but others did. We only managed to stop it for about 10 seconds as people were stood in front of the truck. It was so brief, but it was just long enough to feel and see the pain. In the moment it all happens so quick so all I could do was shout ‘I’m sorry’ to the pigs as they were driven in to the slaughterhouse.

Our group then had to leave so I didn’t see if there were any more. I didn’t manage to get any footage but lots of others did which show one van where the pigs had so little space they were standing on top of each other and they were dirty, and covered in cuts.

I can’t figure out how to post the videos here but you can see them and the photos on the Facebook Page- https://www.facebook.com/EssexPigSave/

I wrote a poem about my experience:

‘Moment’
Today I heard you scream
I saw the pain in your eyes
I smelt the fear
I tasted blood in the air
I felt your soul
if just for a moment…
it was heartbreaking
but I needed to see
I need to know
I wanted you to see a loving face
if just for a moment…
with no time to think it through
all I could say was “I’m sorry”
I couldn’t stop your fate
but I wanted you to know someone cares
if just for a moment..
maybe one day things will change
but for now all I can give you
is a moment….

 

I’ll be attending again as soon as I can. I don’t know who wouldn’t be affected even just hearing the screams. Please consider cutting meat from your diets. Ideally I’d love you all to go vegan but I know that won’t happen over night so at least take positive steps towards it, make yourself at least aware of what happens to begin with. Think about where your food comes from and how it’s been treated.

 

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