Belated post: December 2016

yes I’m a bit backwards in my catching up but here is my post about the last month of 2016. (see my previous post for my look back on the whole year and look forward to the new year)

first how I did with my focus and intentions that month

key words: knowledge, health, magic and self care- magic was there for part of the month as was self care but later these took a back seat unfortunately

goals/intentions

cook more- did do some baking which is more than I’ve done in previous months!

go to Yoga classes- went to 3 classes, couldn’t go on Boxing day as I had to work earlier

walk more often- some walks, a long one on the day of the labyrinth!

not to be affected by other people’s stories/no expectations- part of month yes, partly no

manifestation skills- nothing specific

step fully into role as a healer- started doing womb healings on gift or donation basis (did 4 I think) and also hosted my first worldwide womb blessing group

to have new experiences/visit new places- part of holiday in Portugal went to places we hadn’t been before, went to my first gong bath, walked a labyrinth, took part in a ‘Free Hugs’ event

more activism- none

more of what makes me happy- did healings, went to most yoga classes, went to spiritual events, some vegan meals out

What I got up to

The last few days of our holiday to Portugal- on the Thursday we went to a big family lunch that Miguel’s sister had organised and the final day was very busy! We went out for a coffee with Miguel’s dad in the morning, had lunch out at the health food store, went to visit the Lisbon cathedral and the chapel of St Anthony which was so beautiful. We went to the Carmo Ruins, a church which was destroyed in an earthquake but is still partly up and has a museum inside which had loads of amazing artefacts inside including lots from the Inca. Had ‘Ginga’ (cherry liqueur) and ended the day with going to the best vegan restaurant I’ve been to, it was called the vegan food project. The service was brilliant and food so divine!

I booked two weeks off work for a change, so the following week I was home. In that week I did my first womb healing on a gift or donation basis for someone else, went to a gong bath, went to my friend Sherry’s ‘Soup’ event and it was my work Xmas meal which was at Prezzos in Rayleigh and although some mistakes wasn’t too bad although I don’t think I would choose to go there myself.

Then on the final day of my holiday I went to Saffron Walden and walked the labyrinth there, which was a great experience!

I had three more womb healings the week after, and hosted my first Worldwide Womb Blessing group for a small group of women from my circle. I also went to a Free Hugs event that Sherry also organised. I nearly dropped out at the last minute but I went and did an hour in the end, and think I hugged about 6 or 7 people!

We celebrated winter solstice, and then well the last week was not good as our cat Roxie had to be put to sleep and things went a bit downhill for a while.

But now onwards and upwards!

Poems I wrote

darkness is light

light is darkness

night is second sight

sight is the secret of the night

hidden in the trees

and that tingle in your knees

it comes forth into being

time to believe what you’re seeing.

Poem 2 (quite similar to the first one really)

Welcome the light

at the end of the night

it becomes second sight

there’s no need to fight

try as you might

the dark will not bite

everything will be alright

even when it seems tight.

For Roxie

I don’t want to believe it’s real

but I know by the way I feel

we really did have to say goodbye to you today

your time was up, you were no longer okay

thirteen years ago you came into our lives

a surprise gift from a friend

a beautiful tabby cat with the tail of a squirrel

we named you Roxie

you became an integral part of our family

you were there through thick and thin

you gave unconditional love without question

when food was coming, you’d come running

you would sit on our laps when we felt sad

you never judged us when we got mad

we went through the transitions of our lives together

now we’ve had to be there for your biggest transistion

onto the rainbow bridge

onto the summerland

at least you’ll listen to one hell of a band!

everyday we will miss you

and always remember every blessing you gave us

Goodbye Roxie

you were so special and you always will be

and we know one day, one lifetime

we will see you again.

Poem 4

beneath the moon I saw a shadow

a shadow, but it did not frighten me

as this shadow I needed to see.

 

because the day was rushed

I couldn’t see the finer details

the small print, the minor colours.

 

In my pocket I keep what remains of my soul

although now there is a big hole.

 

Some days disappear like they were just a dream

when you know it was more than what it seemed.

 

I want to be more like the colour red

at least then I wouldn’t dread

what’s been has been

but what’s yet to come

remains to be seen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A look back on 2016 and a look forward to 2017

In 2015 I was a bit early in posting this post, and now I’m late posting 2016. The truth is I have lots of blogs I need to write at the moment, but this is the first chance I’ve had and felt okay to do it. The last week of 2016 and the first week of 2017 have not been good to me. The light is starting to slowly coming back but the last two weeks have been really hard, and for the first time in a long time I’ve not been okay. We had to have one of our cats put to sleep so it started with grief which then morphed into a deep depression and even anger. I felt really alone. However I am now ready to admit I was in a bad place and now is time I can pick myself up again, as the only one who can really do this is me. I have to accept things won’t always be good but they won’t always be bad either. Life is slowly on the up again and one thing I can do to help me is write! So I will slowly start to catch up on my blogs again, as I have lots to say.

let’s start with a look back on 2016..

Music

still not as prominent as it has been in the past, I don’t think I made it to any gigs this year apart from one local one- seeing my friend Ruth’s band T Bitch at their Halloween show at the Railway Hotel, which was really awesome! (it involved one member arriving in a coffin and me standing on a chair in order to see)!

I didn’t buy any new music in 2016 although I did listen to Spotify a lot and tried to diversify my listening a bit by keeping an eye on new releases and checking out their recommended playlists. I don’t think I can really pinpoint anything new in this area.

Books

I set my challenge on Good Reads to read 50 books again, but I still didn’t quite reach it, I think I read 45 or 46 so I have set it for 47 this time.

I think the best books I read were at the end of the year after my Moon Mother training. I read both Red Moon and Female Energy Awakening by Miranda Gray (who trained me). They are about women’s cycles and how to live in harmony with them. They are helping me to change my life! But I will talk more on this in another blog, but I highly recommend them to all women!

Films and TV

I didn’t see any films at the cinema this year. I’m sure I must have watched some good films but I can’t recall any!

TV Wise- Humans was still very good and Black Mirror. Also enjoyed more nature documentaries like Planet Earth.

Photos/Moments/Things I did in 2016

attempted to write a poem a day, which was half successful as a lot of days I didn’t feel inspired by the prompts in the book I was working with!

Passed my Advanced product advisor test for work

Went to see Vampires Rock!

Took part in the first round of the ‘associate of the year’ for work

went to my first Buddhist ceremony

did a meditation workshop at the EDEN conference

Poetry reading at an allotment day twice

Went to Holland

took part in ’30 Days Wild’ in June

helped out at Tower Hill Sanctuary on my birthday

attended 3 Pig Save Vigils

became the supervisor for the Rayleigh store

held my first fire ceremony

went to Whitstable beach in kent

went to a sheep sanctuary

Restarted the Munay ki

went to the Retreat animal sanctuary

became a Moon Mother

went to Portugal

walked the Saffron Walden labrinyth

held my first worldwide womb blessing group, started giving womb healings

did healing at a shamanic weekend

Miguel surprised me with a shamanic wedding blessing ceremony

took part in a free hugs weekend

 

the most popular blogs I wrote in 2016

1. 2016 Focus and Intentions
2. dancing barefoot may 16
3. Essex Pig save
4. belated post: april poems for #shewritespoetry2016
5. 30 Days Wild Week 2 (and a bit)

how I did with my goals and intentions in 2016:

learn more about nature- nature was a big theme of 2016 so a big fat yes. 30 days wild in June really helped too!

heighten my spiritual related work- yes although not in the way I hoped, still didn’t have regular clients (mostly I had none) but I did healing work at a retreat weekend and also can now more healings as I became a Moon Mother so can now do Womb Healings and Blessings, in addition to crystal healing.

get to Peru- not yet!

honour seasons and moon more fully- not to the extent I would have liked.

cook more- nope!

go to yoga classes- yes! apart from when I had the change of jobs and couldn’t go, I have been to a lot of classes in 2016.

walk more often- beginning part of the year yes but once changed job location not so much as no longer walking distance!

better self care- I think overall I was better at resting when I needed to, and I also went to the dentist, the optician and had my well overdue smear test

not to be affected by other people’s stories/no expectations- better with no expectations but still can be very affected by other people’s stories.

harness manifestation- yes, I went from a part time to a full time job and managed to manifest a lot of the ideas I had for my women’s circle this year too.

my focus was: Knowledge, health, magic and self care. I think there was a lot of all those things!

Now finally to move forward to 2017. (a week into it, lol)

My Focus this year is: Balance, Happiness, Divine Feminine

My intentions for this year (including those I set back in October on the witches new year)

1. To Cook more- carrying this one over as I would like to do more with this when I can
2. to have new experiences and visit new places
3. to do more of what makes me happy
4. to step fully into my role as a healer – reworded as still important to me. I love doing the healing work but I need people to come to me to heal!
5. To do more activism again -would be great to fit in where I can for causes I feel passionate about
6. be better at birthdays- I’ve had this before too, last year partly because of lack of money part of the year I wasn’t very good at it. This year I’d like to be more organised and thoughtful
7. finish my lists!- I am a list hoarder and that won’t ever change. However I have lists on my phone with stuff that’s been on there for ages (things to buy etc) so I want to start getting rid of those things!
8. Give up the Pill- I’ve been on the pill for about 18 years, I’ll go into this on my blog about womb healing/cycles more but now is the time to come off and change contraception method.I’ve got 3 months left so I will use those first, and that gives me time to explore my options
9. Live to my cycle and educate others- as I’ve already briefly mentioned (and will go deeper in another post) I’ve been learning more about women’s cycles and it is really helping me to understand myself and other women better. I want to be able to live with this cyclic nature in mind. I also want to help other women to understand the nature of their cycle
10. make more time for creativity- whatever that is- writing, colouring, collaging…just time to create, even if just for myself.